April Fools Day

[WestEndAngler]

Y'all don't get sucked into any jokes now you hear

Last year we did one where FWE was closing down lol YEAH RIGHT like that will ever happen

This year I've seen a few good ones going around but the best I've heard so far was Cody who called me saying his truck & boat got stolen but they left my rims lol

[Race1Mopar]

Since I can't April Fool'ya how bout a good joke

Texas Rancher-
________________________________________
A DEA officer stops at a ranch in South Texas, and talks with an old rancher. He tells the rancher, “I need to inspect your ranch for illegally grown drugs.” The rancher says, “Okay, but do not go in that field over there,” as he points out the location. The DEA officer verbally explodes saying, “Mister, I have the authority of the Federal Government with me.” Reaching into his rear pants pocket, he removes his badge and proudly displays it to the rancher. “See this badge? This badge means I am allowed to go wherever I wish, on any land. No questions asked or answers given. Have I made myself clear? Do you understand?”

The rancher nods politely, apologizes, and goes about his chores.

A short time later, the old rancher hears loud screams and sees the DEA officer running for his life chased by the rancher’s big Santa Gertrudis bull! The officer is clearly terrified.

The rancher throws down his tools, runs to the fence and yells at the top of his lungs… “Your badge. Show him your BADGE!”

[WestEndAngler]

Since I can't April Fool'ya how bout a good joke

Texas Rancher-
________________________________________
A DEA officer stops at a ranch in South Texas, and talks with an old rancher. He tells the rancher, “I need to inspect your ranch for illegally grown drugs.” The rancher says, “Okay, but do not go in that field over there,” as he points out the location. The DEA officer verbally explodes saying, “Mister, I have the authority of the Federal Government with me.” Reaching into his rear pants pocket, he removes his badge and proudly displays it to the rancher. “See this badge? This badge means I am allowed to go wherever I wish, on any land. No questions asked or answers given. Have I made myself clear? Do you understand?”

The rancher nods politely, apologizes, and goes about his chores.

A short time later, the old rancher hears loud screams and sees the DEA officer running for his life chased by the rancher’s big Santa Gertrudis bull! The officer is clearly terrified.

The rancher throws down his tools, runs to the fence and yells at the top of his lungs… “Your badge. Show him your BADGE!”

This one was posted yesterday.... http://www.fishwestend.com/forum/showthread.php?t=5830

[Race1Mopar]

awww dang!

Ok... Guess that means joke two

A man told his doctor he wasn't able to do all the things around the house like he used to.
When the examination was complete, he said "Now Doc, tell me in plain English what is wrong with me."
"Well in plain English," the doctor replied, "you're just lazy."
"Okay," said the man. "Now give me the medical term so I can tell my wife."

[Jampilot]

That's typical.

[Robalo]

Dear Abby:

I want to marry a nice, sweet girl who just completed her prison sentence for abandoning her illegitimate kid. My problem is, my dad sells drugs, my mother died in an asylum of syphilitic insanity, my two sisters are hookers and my older brother is awaiting trial for killing his girlfriend's husband. My younger brother is a U.S. congressman. Should I tell my future bride the awful truth about my younger brother?

PETE W., Gilchrist

Dear Pete:

Absolutely! And, unless you're afraid it will scare her off, you should also mention you're a creative writer.

[Robalo]

Obama is really changing his tune-he is asking Pelosi to undo the Healthcare plan.

Al Gore said Global Warming is really BS.

Welfare is going to only rich folks and poor folks pay 90% of the taxes.

Pelosi is winner and Boxer is runner-up in Miss Universe Pageant.

Democrats want to hold off spending and balance the Budget.

Question:

Is any of the above true?

NOPE.

[bountyhunter]

Today is no longer "April Fools Day"! From now on it will be called by it's new name.............."Obama Day"!

[XtremeAngler]

ha I like that

Today is no longer "April Fools Day"! From now on it will be called by it's new name.............."Obama Day"!

[PasadenaMan]

Wife got me good today. We went on a lunch date and leaving the hartz in spring is tricky. I got to work after lunch and she called me to tell me someone hit her and it was her fault!!!!! This would have been her 2nd wreck at fault in 3 months.

Good thing she was just joking. She called me on my work # and said she wrecked, I asked her are u ok and was it your fault, she said it was fault and car is totalled and come pick her up. I grabbed my keys and started to hang up and she said april fools.

She drives a mercedes suv that has 12 air bags so I beleived her.