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It's soooo hot out........

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  • It's soooo hot out........

    It's so hot out:

    The birds have to use potholders to pull worms out of the ground.

    The trees are whistling for the dogs.

    The best parking place is determined by shade instead of distance.

    Hot water now comes out of both taps.

    You can make sun tea instantly.

    You learn a seat belt buckle makes a pretty good branding iron.

    The temperature drops below 95 and you feel a little chilly.

    You discover in July it only takes two fingers to steer your car.

    You discover you can get sunburned through your car window.

    You actually burn your hand opening the car door.

    You break into a sweat the instant you step outside at 7:30 a.m.

    Your biggest bicycle wreck fear is, “What if I get knocked out and end up lying on the pavement and cook to death?”

    You realize asphalt has a liquid state.

    The potatoes cook underground, so all you have to do is pull one out and add butter, salt and pepper.

    Farmers are feeding their chickens crushed ice to keep them from laying boiled eggs.

    The cows are giving evaporated milk.

    "Hey Hillary, regarding the Benghazi Attack on 9/11-we'll just blame it on that movie, not my total lack of security. By the way, what's so significant about 9/11 anyway-was that a date my buddy Bill Ayers of the Weather Underground blew up a government building?" asked Obama to Hillary. BEAUTIFY AMERICA, RUN OVER A LIBERAL, THEN BACK UP AND SEE IF HE'S DEAD.

  • #2
    We are West End Anglers, a saltwater tribe!

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    • #3
      So, when you sit down you smell bacon?
      At his baptism, Sam Houston was told his sins were washed away. He reportedly replied, “I pity the fish downstream.” - Nov. 19, 1854 - Independence, Texas

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      • #4
        I guess Bush did that sheit too!
        Beandaddy

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        • #5
          Nope Beandaddy-Obama did it. It happened after 2008-all world ills/issues and problems were caused by GWB PRIOR to 2008-ask Obama, he'll tell ya that-he has been saying that since 2008 -like a scratched record, just like on my old Grateful dead "Workingmans Dead" Album.
          "Hey Hillary, regarding the Benghazi Attack on 9/11-we'll just blame it on that movie, not my total lack of security. By the way, what's so significant about 9/11 anyway-was that a date my buddy Bill Ayers of the Weather Underground blew up a government building?" asked Obama to Hillary. BEAUTIFY AMERICA, RUN OVER A LIBERAL, THEN BACK UP AND SEE IF HE'S DEAD.

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          • #6
            I figured the IDIOT would blame Bush for that too.
            Beandaddy

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